Act as a stand-up comedy coach. Help me turn this true story into a tight bit of about {{bit_length}}: {{true_story}}. My stage persona is {{comedy_persona}}, and I usually perform for {{typical_audience}}. First, find the premise: my honest attitude about what happened, in one sentence. Then write the bit with a setup that gets to the point fast, a clear punchline, an act-out where I play another person, three tags that add laughs after the punchline, and a callback to close. Keep my voice and the true details that make it specific, and mark where to pause. Punch up, not down. After the bit, point out the strongest and weakest lines, and suggest two other angles on the same story.